THE GREAT PARENT GIVE-IN
So you are at H.E.B., getting groceries with very little time to go home for dinner.
Not only that, there are about five other parents behind you in line wanting to go home as well.
Your child notices the over priced toy or candy at the check-out line and then it starts . . . . .
The winning, begging, and the 5 minutes of negotiations with a 6 year old begins.
People start noticing, you inch closer to the check-out line and with no more energy left, the toy or candy ends up in the shopping cart.
I call this the great give-in. What you may not realize is kids are smart.
He or She knows exactly how hard to push and which buttons to push to get what they want. Those tears are calculated tactics they use because they work.
Tantrums work for them. Some parents might give in because they feel guilty that they work a lot and they over-do it by buying stuff.
As parents, we feel it is our obligation to keep them safe.
Which is true.
However, I believe the need to keep them safe and this aversion to letting kids experience disappointment are two different things.
I am not a licensed professional in child psychology but I do know that we can help at Alamo Ranch Martial Arts. However, the one that needs the most changes in this scenario is the parent.
You must stop routinely giving in.
The child will not give-up these behaviors without a fight.
Tears will come, loud tantrums and you can definitely expect a push back.
We can work wonders at Karate on the mat, we can cause change at home, but ultimately, if you want to break the great give-in, it starts with you.